Much of my life is centered around my two boys, so much of my writing is, as well.
Today, we went out to the soccer fields since Daddy had a soccer game. The boys love to go, especially my youngest, J, because he LOVES soccer also. Really, he loves ANY sport.
Today I began getting really serious about getting back to my healthy self, so while Daddy played, instead of sitting down and watching, like I usually do, I was up walking all over the empty fields and playing a little soccer with my boys.
However, the best part came when my boys decided they were going to be the devilish little men they are and they began playing in the water that has collected in the ditches from all the rain we have had lately. It was a beautifully sunny and warm day today, so I fought everything in me that was wanting to yell at them, "Stop playing in that water!! It's dirty. That's gross!!" etc etc. And let me tell you, I was fighting it. Literally, I was having conversations in my head about how I HAD to remember how much fun puddles of water used to be.
"But, disease and all sorts of nastiness could be in that water. What if there's a scratch on one of their legs and something gets into it and we land ourselves in the ER??"
"Seriously Jennifer?? You played outside, usually barefoot and in God knows what. You used to swim in the pond by your house. You are sill alive and well."
I honestly thought about how they hear "No!" or "STOP!" so much in their lives. And I thought about how stifling parents can be. I decided I was going to shove all that fear down and let my boys be boys.
Can I tell you that watching them splash through that nasty water and hearing them giggle and laugh uncontrollably was so precious. More than anything, they were playing TOGETHER. They were united, as brothers, in their fun. There was no arguing, no pushing, no shoving, no hollering, no crying, no tattling, NO SIBLING RIVALRY for about 20 glorious minutes.
They ended up dirty and soaking wet. So my boys rode home in Dad's truck without any shorts...literally their T shirts and undies because I made them take their shorts, shoes, and socks off before getting in the truck.
I worried that their dad would be mad that they would have to get into his truck all nasty, but as he walked up at the end of the game, he just laughed. And my heart smiled for the first time in a long time.
Now, I challenge you to stop worrying so much and just let your boys be boys. There's something amazingly beautiful about witnessing that happening.
p.s. I also went to the gym afterward and was on the treadmill for an hour straight (not running but walking briskly and running intermittently). It felt AMAZING. I'm bound and determine to work my way back into being the runner I once was.